Who has not happened to him that his son has wanted something and not being able / wanting to give it to him, they have had a reaction that did not correspond to the situation?
There is a moment when children realize that their way of acting has an influence on us. They are becoming aware that there are situations that make us give in more easily or in which we pay more attention. Very intuitively, they exaggerate their reactions to achieve what they demand. We tell you what to do when children exaggerate their emotions.
This situation not always easy to handle, more if we are not at home and we are surrounded by family / friends or in open spaces such as supermarkets, buses, etc., where we feel that people judge us. What can be done at times like this?
1. Take a deep breath. The most important thing is to feel that you control the situation. Reacting quickly doesn't help. Either we get nervous and yell at our children to stop like this, or we give in to anything to avoid those reactions.
The truth is that none of these answers teach children anything. We ask that they do not react badly, but we are the first to get upset, or we give in to end that behavior as soon as possible, ultimately achieving that behavior is maintained over time, because they learn to get things quickly.
2. Stop to think. What do you stress the most? Our kids don't do things to annoy or drive us. Especially in early childhood, children seek to assert themselves, to feel that they are someone other than their parents. At that moment, they challenge the elders (you do this, I who am someone different from you, I do the other). It is a process. You don't always have to enter a power struggle in which we win to show who's boss. You have to choose the battles, give in on unimportant things, know what other things we don't want to miss.
You may feel like you are not in control of the situation. Obligations, the house, the family ... sometimes we jump to things that are not the root of the problem. It is worth stopping to think what we can do to put reality little by little in order, to know how to direct our behavior in the right direction. It is not always easy. But starting to be aware is the first step.
Sometimes it also happens that we feel judged as parents. When you feel like this, try to think that from the outside everything looks easier. No one is aware of your situation, the things that are at stake or how you are emotionally at that moment. Try to escape, react as you feel you should and forget about others. Each one leads his life as he wants / can. You have the right to make mistakes and to decide at all times what you think is best for your family.
3. Don't forget to ask yourself what your child is trying to tell you with their behavior. Sometimes children's reactions are more related to getting our attention than to getting something material. We must read between the lines, maybe you need me more these days? Maybe you feel insecure about something? Maybe I have been more absent?
Sometimes, realizing this allows us to approach in another way, listening to what the child really needs, putting words to what we think is happening to them. Sometimes the simplest answer is the correct one.
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